When I was 18 I was paid to go to a DR. Get a script for Vicodin, and Valium, I kept the Valium, and sold all the Vicodin to one guy who drove me, paid the DR. Paid for both prescriptions and gave me $100, so I made $100 and a bottle of Valium.
I learned about "DR. Shopping" "quack DR's" and I memorized drugs and their side effects, so I could now go to any DR. Say I had pain, and that these meds didn't work for me because of these side effects, leaving the Dr. with only one option, the drug I wanted.
At 1st I didn't like Vicodin, my opiate addiction started with a cough syrup, then Vicodin, then ES's then Hp's (Norcos) then Percodan, right about that time Oxycontin was realized. Then I found a DR. Who gave you whatever you wanted, and didn't even charge!
I was selling most of these drugs, but I was doing some Oxy's. AT one point I was doing $20,000.USD transactions at a time, money would be deposited in my bank, I would buy a friend a plane ticket NYC to San Francisco who would buy 500+ 80 mg Oxy's at a time. BY the time I realized I was addicted I had a $500 usd habit, not a cent of which I paid. But I obviously had a problem, so I left, moved cross country, to LA, the withdrawals from OXY is the worst thing I have ever experienced I had to make it stop, I got on Methadone, but I felt trapped on it, so I went to heroin, it was cheaper, at 1st, and I could control my dose, and work my way down, fast forward 10 years, and i now have a $10USD a day heroin habit (I live in Mexico, so it's a lot cheaper)
I am trying to continue to lower my dosage, but its hard, I want to get high, even though I cant afford to, I want to put needles in my veins, because iI have learned when I do that I feel good. But I have NO veins left, my arms, hands, feet, dick, nowhere, they are all gone, replaced by scar tissue.
If I can do my drugs in 30 mins, with blood all over myself, I have been successful.
That is a good day for me now. I am leaving this week, I don't know when, I might get a plane, bus, or even drive, but I need to get 2-3000 miles away, and get myself stranded to quit.
I have left town a quit for 2 weeks before, and come straight back to get more heroin.
I cant afford rehab, my arms are too fucked up to even look for a job in the winter.
You can see the veins of scars across my hands, and arms. So that is how this all began, I hope it will end in the jungle in the middle of nowhere. It has too, I have been given this chance to get away and some basic supplies, in a backpack and I do not want to come home till I'm sure this is out of me forever, I can never take a Vicodin, a Tylenol 3 anything ever again. I can't handle it, In my lIfe I have beat several addictions, injecting meth, eating 20+ Valium a day.
But this I CAN NOT QUIT, THE ONLY WAY IS FOR ME TO NOT BE ABLE TO GET IT. I will steal, lie, sell my stuff, or yours to get enough drugs to not get sick for 4 hours. Thats where I am at now, just trying to keep from getting sick.
But I have to get sick, people, my dad died of cancer, the suffering he went through was horrible, he had no choice. I don't either, this is my cancer, and I have to live with it.
Im Guessing for at least a year I will be wanting this crap, and I might be on the road running for a year if I have to. It's the only way, I have gone to NA meetings, they say if your on drugs, please don't speak, well how the fuck do I ask for help. So I sit there and listen to people talk about not cleaning their bathroom with a toothbrush all night, and being able to sleep, I no longer relate to that. I don't believe in a higher power. That is not an option for me, maybe someone to call when times are hard would be nice but it remains to be seen if I will have that. All I have to do is get high, get on a plane, get off, get sick, find a place to sleep. And not come home for 2 months, like that it sounds easy, I know it wont be.